Breathing: A Guide for the Elderly

Oh, great: yoga has been ruined for me as well. What else is going to be taken? I swear, this breathing problem started out as a pain as has developed into a life-destroying menace. The wife says I have to sleep in the other room because I wheeze in my sleep. I’ve had to quit the football team because I just can’t catch my breath, and now I thought I’d join yoga because it’s supposedly non-strenuous. Nope, can’t have that either. My Guru came up to me at the start of the session, when we were sitting cross-legged and focusing on our breathing exercises, and said that I was disturbing the people around me with how I snorted every time I breathed in.

She didn’t kick me out, as such, but I know where I’m not wanted. Fortunately I picked up a few brochures for hyperbaric oxygen therapy, and some even offer a portable option for you to set up at home. I should just go to the doctor, I know, but it doesn’t feel that serious. I just need to open up my lungs a bit more, to get rid of all the wheezing and snorting, and the ability to properly catch my breath when I’ve been running might be a plus.

I’ll admit, that sounds pretty serious, but that’s just the ageing process. I’m not a young man any more, and I can’t just be going to the doctor for hyperbaric medicine when I can’t run like I did when I was twenty. That’s silly. But I do need to sort out the noise, because that’s affecting the people around me…and getting me barred from a lot of places. Hopefully I can find a place in Melbourne, hyperbaric chambers may be the kind of thing that’s hard to find. I’m sure it will all work out and I’ll be sleeping easy in no time. Might even be able to take up yoga again. Although my Guru is a little bit…passive-aggressive for my liking.